Wishes

Nov. 23rd, 2011 11:22 pm
draconisregena: (star girl)
[personal profile] draconisregena
I wish....I wish that I didn't know the statistics for pregnancy and loss. Right now, I wish that I didn't know how difficult it is for the human body to produce and sustain a pregnancy. How many things have to go perfectly to get past even the first set of cell division, much less to grow and implant and be born. I wish that I didn't know when Day 1 of a pregnancy was so that...when I don't start my period and get all hopeful, it wasn't so crushing when I do start 3 weeks later.

I wish I wasn't having to start the whole process over again. I will take another pregnancy test before I start injecting again, but with all the bleeding I've been doing I'm expecting a negative result. I know that 30-45% of fertalized eggs never make it to a sucessful outcome. I can't ignore the statistics, it's basic biology. Right at this moment, I'd be happier being ignorant.
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